I won’t be blogging for awhile

In case anyone wonders where I am from now until I don’t know when, I won’t be blogging for awhile. 

Of course I realize that when you post something in a public forum, it is there for the world to see.  But it never dawned on me that there were a group of adult women out there picking my every move apart, likely critiquing my every activity, talking about my friends who I post about and likely cheering as I went through life’s harder moments such as burying my little dog or my beloved equine friend.  I can only imagine the joy when they read about me being body-slammed to the ground so hard that I lie motionless and breathless for several minutes before I could finally muster the strength to get back up. 

Bob is the most precious thing in the world to me so I try not to blog much about him but now I know I’m being watched mostly because of my relationship with him. 

I don’t even know what to say for people like that.  I can only say that it is sad and pathetic.  I don’t understand that level of meaness and ‘sport’.  I don’t get it.  Life is not easy.  My life has not been easy.  But it has been fantastic for the past nearly 15 years.  A gaggle of piteous, petty women won’t be changing that for me. 

I like to help people.  Nothing makes me happier than helping.  So, one of the reasons why I blogged was to help people learn from my mistakes or get tips from information I gathered.  I am always happy to share information and I find other people’s blogs helpful to me. 

I am not a perfect person.  I cuss like a sailor, am a slacker when it comes to keeping a home, although I’m by no means a slob, I don’t have a schedule that allows me to cook home meals and I’m terrible about leaving my clothes in the dryer (which Bob always, very sweetly folds for me).  I never bathe my dog, she sleeps in the bed with us, my closet looks like a bomb blew up in there right now, I’m terrible about keeping my car serviced, I’m an impatient driver, I’m terrible at remembering people’s birthdays, I don’t see my dad enough or spend enough time with my sister and I really do not clean my tub nearly as much as I should.  But, I am a good person.  To the core.  I feel like a braggart saying so but I know it for certain now.  I am constantly worried about being good.   Doing the right thing.  Helping anyone wherever and whenever I see a need.  I cannot bear to see someone down, even if I don’t know them.  I help perfect strangers.  I watched a woman trip in DC once and get completely obliterated on the sidewalk – papers flew everywhere and no one stopped to help.  I was on the other side of the street and couldn’t get to her fast enough to help and it broke my heart.  Another time in DC, I literally saw a man get hit by a cab and I could NOT believe how people just stood there!  I remember seeing it and going, “OH MY GOD!”  Expecting others to rush in, I held back.  I always feel like I’m somehow first on the scene and I really try to remove myself so I’m not constantly inserting myself into situations.  But people just stood there.  I was in very high heels and ran as fast as they could carry me and there I was, the smallest one in stature on the scene, in freaking heels, helping that poor man to his feet while able bodied men stood by.  I was so angry at everyone standing nearby.  I remember shooting a look at one man like, “What the fuck?  Get over here, asshole!”  I get that everyone was in shock but c’mon people. 

So, I take comfort in knowing that I am a good person and the best friend you could possibly have but it is very hard for me to process knowing a bunch of catty women are spying, poking fun, dissecting, just for sport.  And I write about it here because I want them to know how pathetic I know they are.  And how they should be ashamed. 

There aren’t a lot of good people in the world.  But I do know there ARE plenty good people in the world.  Don’t destroy the good ones.  If you envy them or are jealous of them, watch only to observe and maybe copy to make your life better so you can then maybe make someone else’s life better.  Don’t destroy what is good. 

I know I’ll hear from my close friends on this.  I’m fine.  I had breakfast with Scott who makes me laugh like none other.  I could easily be heard throughout the restaurant as I cackled at some of his most recent stories and just the funniest shit that he says.  Then, I have lunch with Sam (for the dog pack’s benefit, Sam is a female) who I just adore spending time with and never get to see enough because she’s in school in NC now.  Tonight, I get to see Dave, who, next to Bob and Lisa, is probably my biggest treasure (aside from family, of course).  We’ll do some obscure movie (because he always calls the shots in the movie selection department) and we’ll eat some kind of food that Bob would avoid like sushi or Indian or something like that so I can get my international food fix on.  Then, I will be ready for another day. 

This says it all.